Every week celebrities go on Twitter and speak their minds. Sometimes they’re funny, sometimes they’re thought-provoking, and sometimes we don’t know what they’re talking about. This list is all of that and more. Strap in. It could get bumpy.
WTH are trans vaginal mesh implants???? does anyone else see these commercials 500 times a day?
— Kim Kardashian (@KimKardashian) February 10, 2014
What channel is she watching?
I'll be impressed when an NFL player comes out as being Jewish.
— Michael Ian Black (@michaelianblack) February 10, 2014
That’ll really break down some walls.
If cops just arrested guys wearing denim carpenter shorts and New Balance, 99% of pedophiles would be off the streets.
— Jenny Johnson (@JennyJohnsonHi5) February 10, 2014
*Throws away his New Balance shoes.*
Are these female snowboarders hot or am I crazy bi now?
— Megan Ganz (@meganganz) February 10, 2014
No, they’re definitely hot.
Bob Costas wants to go home.
— josh groban (@joshgroban) February 10, 2014
And he did.
I just gave a mean IT guy my password, so now I have to change about 400 passwords.
— Alison Forns (@alisonforns) February 10, 2014
The worst.
just heard Lindsey Vonn speak. Me got dumberer. Amazing like shut it stupid. Riiight.
.
— Kathleen Madigan (@kathleenmadigan) February 10, 2014
But she’s our Olympic sweetheart. Well, was…
Some days you just have to summon the courage of Bob Costas' pink eye and get on with it.
— Kristen Schaal (@kristenschaaled) February 10, 2014
It was inspirational.
Now it’s time to see how real the NFL GMs and Owners really are. They’re supportive now, hopefully they will be supportive throughout.
— Keyshawn Johnson (@Thromedamnball) February 10, 2014
Truth.
My RE teacher told the class that Homosexuality was an illness. I asked him if I could go home early as I was feeling a bit gay. He said no.
— Ricky Gervais (@rickygervais) February 10, 2014
Point, Ricky.
Gay football players rule. #represent
— Neil Patrick Harris (@ActuallyNPH) February 10, 2014
WooooO!
Dear God: Please keep the bag on Shia LaBeouf's head. Love, Denis. http://ift.tt/1iWcKR7
— Denis Leary (@denisleary) February 10, 2014
Are you listening, God?
When I pause FIFA or GHOSTS RT @KitchenGawdess: 3. How do you know when you love someone?
— Chad Johnson (@ochocinco) February 10, 2014
Whoa, that is serious when that happens.
.@FoxNews Will all gay people have to join the NFL now?
— rob delaney (@robdelaney) February 11, 2014
No answer…hmmm.
Stole a magazine from the gyno but it's ok cuz….. well, they know what they did.
— erinn hayes (@hayeslady) February 11, 2014
Seems like a fair trade.
I am really into licking the prom queens tongue lately
— James Deen (@JamesDeen) February 11, 2014
Umm, okay?
Falling naked 12 to 15 feet into a shallow pool of Lego's would be one of the worst pains in history.
— DC (@DaneCook) February 11, 2014
Was that in The Lego Movie?
To his credit, Shia has provided us with the easiest costume for Halloween '14.
— Jason Biggs (@JasonBiggs) February 11, 2014
Dammit, now everyone knows what I’m going as this year.
Doing a kickstarter to raise $ for rich kids who have never heard the word no. Please help!
— Sarah Silverman (@SarahKSilverman) February 11, 2014
I’m in.
There is no sighing on Twitter.
— Andy Kindler (@AndyKindler) February 12, 2014
Is that like no crying in baseball?
you ever notice it's always the non rock stars acting like rock stars and the actual rock stars are hiding in the back w/ a hat pulled low?
— P!nk (@Pink) February 12, 2014
She has a point.
I've never washed a piece of fruit in my life I eat straight from the store so don't fuck with me
— alexandria morgan (@AlexandriaMorgz) February 12, 2014
So hardcore.
That girl hip hop dancing before doing the luge seems cool
— Hannah Kasulka (@hkasulka) February 12, 2014
Understatement of the week.
Every time Bob Costas tries to blink, an angel cuts off its hands.
— Alison Forns (@alisonforns) February 12, 2014
I did not know that.
Starting off the day with some @Terry_World http://ift.tt/1iWcL7F
— Emily Ratajkowski (@emrata) February 12, 2014
I like how she starts her day.
Finally, Alex Rodriguez can become the shortstop of the New York Yankees.
— Richard Deitsch (@richarddeitsch) February 12, 2014
Yes! Oh, wait.
I AM…CONFUSED ABOUT HOW FAMOUS OR NOT FAMOUS I MIGHT POTENTIALLY BE…ANYMORE…
— Emile Hirsch (@EmileHirsch) February 12, 2014
I AM…ACCIDENTALLY ON CAPS.
— Emile Hirsch (@EmileHirsch) February 12, 2014
Way better than Shia LaBeouf’s recent tweets.
Bob Costas's bleeding eyeballs reminded Derek Jeter of his own mortality.
— Alison Forns (@alisonforns) February 12, 2014
This farewell tour is going to be worst than Bob’s eyes.
How great were the days when Paul Newman, Greg Peck, Cary Grant and Steve McQueen would do bag-headed "art" and we loved it so! #Nostalgia
— Rob Lowe (@RobLowe) February 12, 2014
That Peck, he was such a wacky dude.
I didn't drop Doug as manager… he gracefully resigned. We want the best for each other.
— Courtney Stodden (@CourtneyStodden) February 12, 2014
Oh, thank God. I was worried.
7 years ago you released your 1st sex tape! RT @KimKardashian: 10 years ago today Kanye released his 1st album!
— Jenny Johnson (@JennyJohnsonHi5) February 12, 2014
It’s a double celebration!
Te llevo en mi cuerpo y corazón! #boricua #mimejorcara #YOSOYPUERTORICO http://ift.tt/1ggplhF
— Roselyn Sanchez (@Roselyn_Sanchez) February 12, 2014
What she said…
I just want her to see the real me.
#ThingsMenNeverSay
— DC (@DaneCook) February 13, 2014
Ever.
Twitter is a way to connect to fans and friends but it's now become owned by assholes and hate. Wish more fans would drown out the jagoffs
— Jay Glazer (@JayGlazer) February 13, 2014
Someone’s having a bad day.
It's a painfully lonely life when you're the only one who thinks there could be truth to the Obama/Beyoncé rumors.
— Jen Kirkman (@JenKirkman) February 13, 2014
You are not alone, Jen.
This is a total nightmare trying to leave Charlotte. All flights cancelled today. It's just a lil snow guys. I'll fly the plane.
— Ryan Lochte (@RyanLochte) February 13, 2014
I would pay good money to see that happen.
I bet east coasters are dreaming of that nice Sochi weather right about now.
— josh groban (@joshgroban) February 13, 2014
But it was warm for the Super Bowl!
In Canada, you get to watch the Olympics on TV. In USA, you get to watch an uninspired guy talk about an inspiring story about 1 Olympian.
— Judah Friedlander (@JudahWorldChamp) February 13, 2014
‘Murica.
Does @Tinder have something to do with groceries? I saw my wife using it on her phone and then she left to get groceries?
— Tom Crabtree (@itsCrab) February 13, 2014
Uh, yeah, sure, that’s it, Tom.
Have you ever spent an entire day wearing your underwear backward? Well I just did. Goodnight from Sochi. Join us tomorrow for the men's FS!
— Johnny Weir-Voronov (@JohnnyGWeir) February 13, 2014
Seriously, he needs to announce at all the events.
If I don’t hear at least one person call it Valentime’s day I will be so pissed.
— Melissa Stetten (@MelissaStetten) February 14, 2014
Don’t worry, it’ll happen.
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH #SISWIM50
— christine teigen (@chrissyteigen) February 14, 2014
Right there with you, Chrissy.
In bed watching the top 10 worst housewives dinners, just in case you think I might have changed on you now.
— christine teigen (@chrissyteigen) February 14, 2014
We never doubted you.
Hello Cupid you dumb son of a bitch. GO FUCK YOURSELF
— The Iron Sheik (@the_ironsheik) February 14, 2014
Have a great weekend, everybody!
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