Thursday, January 23, 2014



Even if a lunch lady were a criminal mastermind, how much do you think she could steal over 15 years? Your best guess is probably way way off as the case of former cafeteria manager Brenda Watts has taught us.


According to a report from WSB in Atlanta, Watts was able to steal $500 a day. Over 15 years, assuming the numbers were uniform, Watts stood to make over $1,350,000 during her 15 year tenure.



WSB initially reported on the story after hearing from a whistleblower, forcing Watts into retirement in June of 2013.


Watts’ scheme? A cash-only line in the cafeteria that went unreported over Watts’ tenure. The whistleblower claims that the practice went on for at least 15 years, possibly even 20 years.


Watts’ prize? A five bedroom home in Georgia with a Mercedes along with it.


Unfortunately, Watts’ long con has come to an end: She’s been taken into police custody after 10 warrants for her arrest were issued stemming from the charges by her ex-coworker.


The important thing, as Barstool’s Big Cat points out, when your cafeteria lady is living in a house that seems more appropriate for an Atlanta Hawks player and his entourage, that’s probably a bit of a dead giveaway.


My question is how much Salisbury steak was this chick slinging to rack up $500 a day on some cash only line? Georgia’s supposed to be one of the most affordable places to live and she was able to rack up money like she was running card games? Very confusing.


I kind of admire it so much that I feel like she deserves to not be arrested. If you’re a cafeteria worker and somehow grinded your way to a 5000 square foot house, legally or illegally, the cops should probably just go, “Welp, she won this round” and let it slide. Just seems more fair.



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